It Begins With One

The current sermon series I am preaching is entitled, “Seeking the Heart of God.” It is based upon the life of David (“a man after God’s own heart”) and is covering 2 Samuel. Of course to seek God is not to be perfect, but should lead us to better reflect Him and His character. Last week’s message was on the need for our motivation to be from love. This week’s message was on reconciliation.

As I mentioned a couple of weeks ago, I am also working through several books to help me be more productive (i.e. personal effectiveness) and one to get me “unstuck” in a couple of areas. Well, to bridge the gap between the effectiveness I seek and the reconciliation God desires for me, I must seek a solution that begins with me.

To reconcile means to bring into balance. That is what I am trying to do. At present, a part of my life is out of balance. I am not actively engaged in anything wrong, I am just stuck. And a part of that “being stuck” might be considered procrastination. I am not actively procrastinating (I don’t think), but I keep pushing off two particular tasks which do not have a definitive timeframe for completion, are very cumbersome, and for which I can not seem to determine a good approach (for one especially). However, I am beginning to see a possibility for that one item and have gained a bit of momentum on the other this past week. How? I took inventory.

Again, being reconciled means to bring into balance. Some will reconcile their bank balance to the personal records for instance. Others immediately think of reconciling with a person or a group of people (the focus of my sermon this week). But oftentimes, one of the biggest challenges to true reconciliation is that as an individual, I (and perhaps you as well) do not stop to take the time to see where I am out of balance with myself (or you with yourself). This is a real issue and can best be resolved with pen and paper or at a minimum seeing the words on a screen.

The reality is that we often think we know what may be wrong, but let half-developed ideas ramble around inside our heads and never force ourselves to deal with those ideas. By writing them down (or typing them), we can visualize the problems and begin to make sense of them in a more tangible way. We are also likely not to combine as many ideas; rather, by listing out a few, and taking time to truly analyze each one, many discover deeper challenges or realize that certain issues dominate others and deserve more attention in the short-run.

The truth is that whatever the focus of reconciliation, the process can be the same. Instead of needing to improve personal effectiveness (like I do right now), perhaps another time I will need to reconcile with another person. In that case, I can still take an inventory about the situation and list areas where I need to focus. Bringing myself into balance will be important before trying to bring another person into balance with me. In others words, I should learn to better know myself before I seek to better know others. Now, that statement is not an excuse to ignore others until I am perfect (because I never will be), but sometimes I have found that when tension exists in a relationship, it is not necessarily what someone else has done, rather, it is how I interpreted the action because of something that I was dealing with (or not dealing with) personally.

So, reconciliation begins with one. And for me, that one is me. And for you that one is you. It is that simple. But as you begin to know yourself and I begin to know myself, we should then seek to reconcile with others. After all, that is what God did for us on the cross and, as Paul wrote in 2 Corinthians 5, we now have the responsibility to be agents of reconciliation for God – first toward Him and then towards one another.

With that, I encourage you to stop and take inventory about whatever is troubling you in your life and/or relationships. It must begin with one. For me, I have begun that process, and plan to see it through. And I am writing this post as a reflection of what I am learning and as an encouragement you take inventory of yourself as well.